Tony Soprano's Death Derby

I write this four hours before tonight's episode of The Sopranos. There are only five shows left in the series and let's just say that there are more than a few loose ends to tie up. Will Tony's sudden, severe gambling problem lead to rash decisions? Will Bobby Bacala's sloppy whack job in the premiere come back to bite him? Has Christopher permanently gotten on Tony's bad side? What will come of Carmela's suspicions about Adriana's death? But the most pressing question of all is: who will kill Tony Soprano? In my opinion, t's a foregone conclusion that Tony will meet his demise at the end of the series. He's lived a life of violence and it makes sense that violence will cause his own undoing. The only question is who pulls the trigger. Here are my odds:

Dr. Melfi: 500/1

This one has a chance simply because nobody would see it coming. She's the one character who's been a constant presence of the series, has a close relationship with Tony (and thus, knows him well enough to develop a hate for him) and has no blood on her hands. Having Melfi as the murderer, (perhaps in self-defense after an emotionally-ravaged Tony attacks her during a session) would be a fitting end for a series that began with Tony seeking her counsel.


Bobby Bacala: 200/1

There must be lingering tension after their Monopoly fight in the premiere, as no man could forget witnessing their wife being insulted like that. But does the normally meek Bobby have the guts to whack his boss?





A.J.: 100/1

Mob stories are often about the transition of power from one generation to the next. Now, A.J. has never seemed like a willing or competent heir to the Soprano family throne. But we've seen flashes of aggression (his attempt on Uncle Junior's life last season) and maturity (his marriage proposal last episode), so there's always a chance that in the next five episodes he'll rise up and take on The Man. Being a jilted lover, he'll have some bottled rage that he can summon some time in the next five episodes.


Janice: 50/1

There has always been a chaotic, nasty quality to the relationship of the two siblings and it could easily bubble over during one of their frequent arguments. Adding fuel to the fire, Janice has always felt that Tony has slighted her husband.




Christopher: 20/1

Tony has never been a fan of Christopher's Hollywood aspirations and the tension between the two has never been higher. It's probably more likely that Tony kills Christopher than vice versa, but a fight between the two could lead to Tony's demise.



Phil Leotardo: 10/1

This is the most conspicuous choice, as the rivalry between the New York and New Jersey families has been building steadily for the past four seasons. But there are three reasons not to pick Phil as the eventual killer: A) he's a boss, and bosses rarely get their hands dirty, B) he seems to have mellowed out after his heart-attack and C) it would just be too obvious.


Carmela: 5/1

Carmela's candidacy is gaining steam, as last week's fight with Tony providing some unexpected fireworks. The spec house ordeal, the aforementioned suspicions about Adriana and Tony's past infidelity could all serve as motives for murder. Having Carmela as the killer would be poetic, with the violent, misogynistic mob boss being taken down by his loving, loyal wife. In fact, I'm convinced that Tony's strained relationship with his wife will be his undoing. But I have a feeling that it won't be Carmela pulling the trigger-- it will be her lover. Yes folks, I'm talking about...


Furio: 3/1

That's right, the one character who's been completely off the radar yet lurking beneath the surface. Furio was a central character up until season 4, when he suddenly moved to Italy to avoid a potentially fatal affair with his beloved Carmela. Furio is the one Sopranos character who's no longer on the show but is still alive. I'm guessing creator David Chase will try to pull the rug from under the audience, with Furio dramatically returning to New Jersey claim Carmela from her oppressor husband. The End.