The Ping's Got That Thing

I watched today's All-Star home run derby, and there's no arguing that Miguel Tejada and Lance Berkman put on an awesome display. However, I was rather disappointed by the weak output from some of the other sluggers. Three lousy homers from Ortiz and Blalock? Just four from the big lumberjack Jim Thome? I know hitting homers is hard, but in a derby environment (where you get to handpick a guy to toss you 80mph meatballs, unlimited pitches, plus ten "outs") shouldn't the best home run hitters on the planet be able to hit at least five out of the park?

I say it's time we go for broke: bring on the aluminum bats. Sure it bastardizes the sport, but the home run derby isn't real baseball anyways. Why not give the fans the most spectacular show possible? It's an artificial event, so there's nothing wrong with using artificial equipment to increase the homer output. Who wouldn't want to see Barry Bonds launching 600 foot bombs out of the stadium? As a bonus, that irresistible ping sound would be a nice homage to the college game, which is an overlooked part of the baseball world. Besides, metal bats are still better than corked ones, right Sosa?