Later, Buddy

The sky was bluer today. The water in the shower was warmer. My coffee was sweeter. Even the fabric in my sweater was softer. Why?

Because with the Stanford football program free of Buddy Teevens, the world is a better place.

In a move that came a year too late, Buddy got the axe from his old friend Ted Leland. In the days leading up to Big Game, my inkling was that Leland would be stubborn and bring Teevens back for one more year. But once we gave up that 40th point against Cal, I said to my friends at the Old Pro: "I can rest a little easier now." With a true drubbing in Big Game, I figured that that would be enough for Ted to swallow his pride. Today, our wildest dreams came true. In all honesty, this is the best moment for the program since we beat 4th-ranked UCLA in November, 2001. Yes, it has been that long.

So who to replace Buddy and lead us back to respectability? Here's my wish list:

1. Norm Chow, USC offensive coordinator It's mind-boggling that this guy wasn't given a head coaching job during either of the past two offseasons. Before he arrived in LA, Carson Palmer was three years into an underachieving, blunder-ridden career. After Chow arrived, Palmer suddenly won the Heisman and USC became an unstoppable offensive juggernaut. Oh yeah, and before that he was at NC State, where he molded a kid named Phillip Rivers.

Stanford will make an offer, but I have little hope of Chow accepting. Some folks on the Bootleg have said that Chow currently gets paid $500K annually, while Stanford only paid Teevens $450K this past year. It would be a great job for Chow, but he knows he could make more money at a more football-centric school or even in the NFL.

2. Urban Meyer, Utah coach He's an offensive wizard, the rare guy who truly innovates with his schemes. Too bad he's almost certainly going to Florida.

3. Butch Davis, Cleveland Browns coach He resurrected a Miami program that was mired in probations, arrests and general recklessness. After leading the 'Canes to an 11-win season (in which they should have played for the national title) he earned his stripes in the League, even taking the Browns to the playoffs. Davis is likely to be fired by Cleveland very soon and college recruits love coaches with recent NFL experience. Again though, Davis would command a high salary and Stanford might be priced out.

4. Rick Neuheisel, unemployed coach Funny how we haven't heard a peep about this guy recently, isn't it? Here's a guy with success at two BCS schools, a Rose Bowl on his resume, and strong West Coast recruiting roots. Other than the shadiness of his recruiting and gambling violations, Slick Rick would make the most sense for Stanford.

5. Dan Hawkins, Boise St. coach His offense can score at will and he's led his team to a top ten ranking and flirtations with the BCS. He wouldn't command a high salary, has experience recruiting in the West, and would jump at the Stanford job if offerred. Of the guys on this list, Hawkins has the best chance of getting hired.

6. Ron Zook, public whipping-boy Kidding!