Unpacking the Brain

I'm back from a two-week vacation in Europe and musings have been piling up in my head. Here are a few random thoughts on pop culture, sports and other stuff:

* As Vincent Vega said in Pulp Fiction, the best thing about Europe is the little differences. For instance: waiters don't hassle you while you're eating; tabloid newspapers include profanity and nudity; men wear capri pants and man-purses; womens' lower-lip piercings are off-center (instead of directly above the chin); tip is usually included in restaurant bills; and best of all they use coins for small denomination. The Sacagawea dollar never took off here, but what about a $2 coin?

* I really like the Audioslave song "Be Yourself" but the bad grammar in the chorus nags at me. "To be yourself is all that you can do" just doesn't sound right. Why didn't Chris Cornell just write it as "Just be yourself/It's all that you can do"?

* It's funny how NBA commentators all talk about how the Pistons "turn it on and turn it off" it terms of intensity for certain games. That's the exact same criticism that dogged the Lakers last year before Detroit whupped them in the Finals. Maybe winning a title just makes every team rest on their laurels, no matter how gritty and diligent they are at heart.

* Speaking of the Finals, the most frustrating aspect of the Spurs-Pistons series is that the games have been blowouts. These are the two best defensive clubs in the league and they're pretty even from a matchup standpoint. It's just a shame that neither team can summon any sort of adrenaline on the road. So it begs the question: would David Stern prefer a seven-game series featuring seven blowouts or a four-game sweep with four buzzer-beaters? I'd take the latter- you've gotta reward fans who sit down and watch these telecasts.

* Yesterday The Sports Guy had cool game in his mailbag: which celebrity flameouts match athlete flameouts? I liked all of his choices but I'm surprised that he so quickly dismissed Mike Tyson and Jason Giambi as having any comparable celebs. Tyson and Michael Jackson are kindred spirits (used to be best in the biz, hit with sordid accusations, now an embarrasing circus act). Giambi's decline mirrors that of Whitney Houston. Or if you want to look at it from an "exposed-as-a-fraud" angle, Milli Vanilli would be an obvious choice. This calls for a letter to Simmons.

* The failure of Cinderella Man at the box office thus far, is one of the more baffling movie phenomena I've ever seen. I haven't seen it yet but the critics have been raving, the film's star is on the A+ list, and there's Oscar talent at every orifice of the film. The only explanation is the release date- a December opening probably would have helped.

* HBO's Entourage is back for a second season and I can't remember being more torn about a series. Despite initially liking the show, as the first season went on I became more and more annoyed with the obnoxiousness of the four leads. The characters are vapid and unsympathetic, the acting is generally wooden, and the show's writers are way too esoteric. You can just picture the writers high-fiving each other going "Dude, what if we had Ali Larter show up in a string bikini in this scene! Sweeeet!!" That said, I can't stop watching Entourage. First of all Jeremy Piven has created one of the great TV characters of our era playing the hilariously cocky agent Ari Gold. And secondly, there's an unavoidable urge to live vicariously through these guys living in a fantasy world.

* Having just returned from Paris, I cannot understand why crepes aren't wildly popular here in the States. Crepes are the perfect post-meal snack- fresh, hot, sweet and best of all, cheap. If I opened up a chain of crepe joints (with clean stores, peppy employees and a huge menu), it could be the next Jamba Juice.